Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie splitting up? Karma’s a bitch

Posted on January 25th, 2010 at 2:59 pm by Kim Hess

Bye, bye Brangelina...no relationship last forever no matter how sexy both parties are...I should know!

Heard about Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie possibly splitting?

The News of the World, a British publication (trashy tabloid!) came out a few days ago saying that Brangelina were splitting up. Angie supposedly was to live with the kids and Brad was going to live next door. I read it, and the news came as no shock. I’m a Divorce Guru for heaven’s sake! People splitting up, whether they’re married or not, is my business, and business is good. (Did you see Inglorious Basterds starring Brad Pitt? Remember when he said “We’re in the Nazi killin” business and business is a boomin’?”

Ha! Didn’t even do that on purpose! Okay back to my underrated opinions!) So, I wasn’t surprised.

What I AM surprised about is the big hulabaloo that the U.S. media is making of Brad and Angelina NOT splitting. Everyone’s up in arms, crawling over each other to say that Hollywood’s golden couple is not splitting up, that the British news story isn’t reputable, and Brad and Angelina are together! Yeah right!

Let’s talk about reputability. Is the American media reputable? And what kind of reputability is needed to say that a couple (who’s not even married!) is splitting up? Who hasn’t heard that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie were having troubles? What couple doesn’t have troubles? None that I’ve known. So why is everyone so adamant that this couple isn’t breaking up? Who knows. All I know is what comes around goes around. If you remember my article “I’m Jennifer Anniston and you’re Angelina Jolie…just not hot” you kind of know where I stand. I’ve since grown and expanded my outlook on how relationships work, but that still doesn’t stop the fact that there is such a thing as karma…and it’s a bitch. Just like Angelina (ooohhhh, bad Kim!)

You fall in love with a man, he leaves his wife for you. No matter how many great things you do for the world or the hundred orphans you’ve adopted, some things just can’t be undone. Like falling in love with a married man. But who am I to talk? Anyway, what you do usually comes back to you full circle. You may cause pain, you’re gonna get some pain. Heck, even if you don’t cause pain, you’re gonna get pain. So is anyone surprised that this couple is breaking up? The divorce rate is significantly higher the second time around. And before some smart ass goes and leaves a comment about “Kim, they weren’t married!” let me break it down for ya.

Angelina was divorced twice before. Brad was divorced as well. They live together. Have adopted and biological children together. Have many homes across the world together. Share their life and their finances…you’re telling me these two aren’t subject to the same stuff because they don’t have a signed legal agreement professing their love?

While the US media is clamoring on about how the rumors are false and Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are NOT splitting up, I don’t see anyone saying that they are very much in love and that they’ll be together for a 50th wedding anniversary. Brangelina as we know it is dead. Now let them move on and take care of all those ~~damn~~ cute kids!

5 Responses → “Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie splitting up? Karma’s a bitch”

anonymous

1 month ago

my, my. everyone is an armchair psychologist these days. you seem to know so much about angelina and brad and their relationship. *rolling my eyes*
i hope they stay together and celebrate their 50th anniversary. then you’ll have to eat your nasty little ‘karma is a bitch’ proclamation.

oh and just so you know aniston is spelled with 1 n not 2. it’s aniston not anniston little miss know-it-all.
Michelle

1 month ago

Wow, that last comment was written by someone who was clearly a little too upset about two people they don’t even know. Honestly, I could care less if they spilt or end up together for a hundred years. They are celebrities which in our world leaves them subject to articles like this. This article is entertaining. I would dare to think that you are proclaiming yourself as the next D.Phil. I do agree that karma is a bitch. I think Brad and Angelina are wonderful people and contribute so much to the world, but that doesn’t erase the shady manner in which they hooked up. Bottom line, your article is entertaining Kim and anyone who can’t take it just for that probably should have not read it once they read the title if they are “above” such things.
Kim Hess

1 month ago

My, my Ms. Anonymous is awfully touchy, huh? (of course Anonymous is a woman, because no man would leave such a bitchy comment!)

And who doesn’t know so much about Angelina and Brad? Where is all of this venom coming from? Guilt maybe? Have you been in Angelina’s shoes? Oops, there goes my arm chair psychology again!

Learn how to loosen up and laugh with life…people will like you more and you won’t come off so bitter. Just sayin! Smooches!
John

1 month ago

My lord! Was that Angelina’s mom with that spiteful message to our dear Divorce Guru? Yikes! She does seem guilty and didn’t read the article…throwing stones about spelling when you can’t read isn’t wise.

Blogs are opinions and perspectives and as far as I’m concerned…Ms. Hess, You are delightful and inspiring! Keep up the great work and don’t let nasty, shameful, bitter haters get you down. Bravo for telling her like it is too.

I know I sound bitter too, but I don’t care. My Divorce Guru is awesome and I don’t care who I’ve gotta tell off!

Everyone have a great day…even if you’re a bitter hater! LOL!