Divorced on New Years 2010
The first thing that stands out in my mind is that me and the ex-husband’s girlfriend actually exchanged smiles…twice! Whoa! I sense some real progress with this “I don’t hate you anymore” trip we’ve both been playing. A simple reminder for those that don’t know: My ex husband and this woman developed a “very special friendship” while we were still married. I recall me calling and cussing her out when I found her phone number on my (then) husbands cell phone records…every day. Three times a day. For a year. And on my birthday. Yeah, I know. So what did I do? What any other wife or girlfriend would do when filled with rage. I called her ass and cussed her out.
Fast forward 3 years…we’re smiling at each other and wishing each other a Happy New Year. Wow. I have to give myself a pat on the back for the growth that I’ve done. I hated this woman. I mean really hated this woman. Why? Because she was making my husband happy. It took me around 3 years to realize that she did me a favor by making my husband happy. Because now I don’t have to. A job that was fairly killing me and making me very unhappy. Now I’m happy. Which is now why I send love and kindness to my ex husband’s girlfriend. And my ex husband…who did not smile or wish me a happy new year 2010…or 2009. But one victory at a time, my friends, one victory at a time.
This insight helped me deal with a phone call I got today. From my Former French Lover’s girlfriend. Notice I said “former.” We dated for less than 3 months. He dumped me. Almost two years ago. So when his girlfriend called me asking me if I was still in love with him I understood where she was coming from. I know what it feels like to be jealous and insecure over a man that you love. Granted, me and the Former French Lover have talked maybe once every 6 months. Okay, not talked but emailed or facebooked. Maybe 2 sentences.
Me: What’s up?
Him: Good.
6 months later:
Me: Merry Christmas! How’s your son? I have a computer question, can you help?
Him: Sure.
The computer problem had to do with my new blog transfer…he helped and sent me 2…2 emails. No talking. No talk of getting together. No sexy talk.
My point is since I had been a raving lunatic, crazy woman over a man I knew where Former French Lover’s girlfriend was coming from. I gently told her I didn’t want her man, he’s a good guy and we hadn’t had sex since 2008. She wasn’t satisfied. I told her there would be no more contact between us. She wasn’t satisfied. That’s when Former French Lover got on the phone screaming that he has done nothing f*&cking wrong and why the hell was she acting like this? I calmly told them both to have a Happy New Years Eve 2010 and hung up. They were still yelling at each other.
I also got an awesome massage for being divorced on New Years Eve 2010. Ahhhh! It was a gift from the owners of the fabulous Energy Talk Radio where I host my radio show (thank you Mike and David!!) After the crazy phone call I needed it.
I also had to calmly tell a foreign restaurant owner that it was bad for business to yell out in your restaurant that people are “white niggers.” We’ll discuss this later so as not to ruin your New Years Eve 2010. Wonder what his take on Tiger Woods
Divorced on New Years 2010
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